Apology 13 Lamp

Tender Loving Stuff
2 Haul Out Blvd.
Trash City
TLS 1H0

The Designers TM Edge Lamp QH-505, Model L-100
Garage/Studio
On the Lane

Dear Lamp QH-505, Model L-100:

I am sorry that you no longer work and I have not managed to get you fixed. It is always sad to see a life cut short in its prime. I am not sure why you stopped working. The bulb looks fine.

It is unclear what happened to you. I remember a puff, crackle and horrid odor when I replaced the bulb. I thought I had the right halogen tube and was careful to handle it with cloth gloves. I tried another bulb that was definitely the right size and under the 500 watt maximum as instructed on the sticker. If the first was the wrong bulb, it might have messed up the thing inside you that makes you work.

We have another lamp that is almost identical, just smaller. It does not work either, but it has no brand name. Among the numerous stickers on you one says, “OUTDOOR USE ONLY” and we probably did use you in the garage. Another says, “FIXTURE IS WARRANTED UP TO ONE YEAR AFTER THIS DATE, Nov 97.”

It is not worth the money to hire an electrician to fix a $9 lamp. Still, I do apologize for leaving you in the heap of things that do not work. I should have put you out of your misery and thrown you in the garbage ages ago.

Sincerely,

Signature small IMG_0087

for TLS

P.S. Recently we bought a similar lamp that has an on/off switch. Suddenly I thought that might be your problem. I did a thorough examination of your body, and you do not seem to have any switches.

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